Another Person Told Me "No" Today

Disclaimer: This blog has nothing to do with my promoter/party life. This is what I really go through. So, this is in no way related to Who Run It?! At Club Miami on Friday, April 13^th w/ Lafayette Dawkins. Or #Foreplay at Club Cream w/ the big homies Josh Knuckles and Mr. Hungreeboy on Saturday, April 14^th. Ooooorrrrrrr… #PRETTYNASTY2012 in Orangeburg by Those Pretty Boy Nupes and Nasty Que Dawgs on Saturday, April 21^st! Salute to Dj Expensive Life and Dj Sway! But like I said… has NOTHING to do with this blog. Enjoy…

Another person told me “no” today. And I replied, “Thank You”. I won’t tell yall what I’m working on yet, but just know that it’s pretty freakin’ AWESOME!!!! In the entertainment industry A LOT of people will tell you NO, but the RIGHT person will tell you “YES”!

 

Perfect example, in 2010 I hosted Homecomings for Clemson, USC and Coastal Carolina. In 2011, I didn’t get invited back to ANY of those. I didn’t understand why for USC and Coastal… *puts hand on chin*. But I DEFINITELY, WHOLE-HEARTEDLY understood Clemson. I can let yall in on a little secret. Come here… come here… I SUCKED AT CLEMSON! No lol. Coming from Claflin, I prepared an HBCU show for Clemson. I just had a bunch of songs lined up expecting them to get up, dance, party-walk and run down the stands. They were looking at me like, “WTF? You want me to do what”? The worst/best show of my career. The worst because I’m really hard on myself. Since I didn’t have the whole auditorium rocking I was TRIPPIN! Really going through it backstage. But the BEST because it made me realize that I needed way more versatility in my shows. I added different sets that weren’t just catered to music. So now I go to shows with a whole goodie bag of sets. You never know what I’m going to pull out. BOOM! *white lady from Wal-Mart commercial voice*

 

So, there you have it. Coastal- no. USC-NO! Clemson- HECCCCKKKK NO! “No, No, NO!” But… When God closes one door, he opens another. I got to host #GHOE201, North Carolina A&T University’s Homecoming Step Show, which was MAJOR! I know people who have been hosting for YEARS who haven’t even been considered for this show yet. Twitter was BLAZING and I got some pretty good reviews. Also, Winthrop University! That was SUPER COOL because I have waited to host that show for years! And it seems like they were waiting on me too! Winthrop went in from beginning to end. Twitter overload and the reviews I received were GREAT! Had a BLAST!

 

I’m grinding and continuing to make steps. But, the sad thing about our culture is that NOBODY wants to support you on the rise, but EVERYBODY wants to claim you when you make it. And NO, I haven’t “made it”, YET! But, I guess I’m saying this to say keep moving and keep working. As long as you don’t give up and sit down they cant deny you. They will talk about you and try their best to discourage you #TRUST! But if you don’t allow their opinions to affect your progress, then they will eventually respect your persistent and determination.

 

The other day, I talked to my “long lost lover homegirl” (best way I can describe our relationship). And she told me, “Dukes, I’m discouraged because I’m trying so hard to succeed and everybody’s closing doors in my face”. I told her, “Build your own door”. “It’s not that easy Dukes…”

 

And it may not be that easy because times are hard right now and who has the money, or energy, to just get up and build their own door? So this is what you do… Instead of constantly reminding yourself, “I have to build my own door” and not putting a plan into action, make steps… This week- buy nails. In two weeks- buy some wood. Next month- buy a door knob… No matter how long it takes you, you keep doing little by little to get to your goal. By building your own door of opportunity, who can shut it? And if they do shut it “So TF WHAT?” You have the key… BOOM! *cues outro music* “Can’t nobody hold me down… Oh No… I gotsa’ keep on moving…” *Diddy Voice*

Summary:
1.) Don't let the h- uhhh... I mean... "no's" discourage you.
2.) Blah... Blah...
3.) Don't take my advice
4.) Follow me on Twitter @jaydukes1911

~Jay Dukes qka Mr. Million Dollars qka Mr. “Hey… You Look Familiar”

Dear Future Son

Dear Future Son,

Have fun, live life in the moment.
I’m working real hard now to get you everything you ever wanted.

Imma cherish your innocence
While trying to teach you common sense.

Cause your pops never have none.
Well… I had fun,
But I took a lot of losses when I thought that I had ONE.

Or maybe two, or maybe three…
I consider love like branches on a tree.
Or more like switches to me.

I would go fetch em and bring em back to ya Nana.
Thought they were okay… But I knew she couldn’t stand em.

One thing I love about that lady, she would teach me before she beat me.
And just shake her head, because I was bringing her a new “switch” weekly.
Good Morning Mass texts, heart tangled up like some seaweed.
Staying out all night while setting up different teepees.

Never can stay too long, gotta get up and move.
Now every decision is prolonged when they say, “Man up and choose”.

I’m confused, ion know…
She say, “I love you, does it show”?
You wanna hear the real answer…
“Hell M*&^% F*&^%^ NO”!!!!

Only game I play is Michael Jackson.
Don’t think of me when you close enough to touch, and forget me when you’re relaxin.

I admit, it was cute, we were living the same dream.
With occasional nightmares.
But what’s this, been a minute and we doing the same thing.
With occasional “ooo yea’s…”

Ok… Ok…
I’m sorry.

Tell your mother I said “HI”!
Remember, REAL men… yea they cry.
But when you sick on the inside,
Just know when to say BYE.

LOVE YOU SON,

Daddy
P.S.  You're coming home as soon as this tour is over.  And PLEASE don’t make the same mistakes I did.

Just thinking

More people believe in Hell than they believe in Heaven.
I got scared into religion stuff back at age seven.

Wait… Wait… Give me time to make it make sense.
Cause I got a natural-haired lady that would kill me talkin like dis.

All I’m saying is…
Are we granted to enter those pearly gates from the way we live.

Ok. Ummm… Let me get this straight.

I can mess up and come back as long as I ask for forgiveness.
But if I KNOW I can mess up and come back am I asking for permission?

I gotta get better with cussin, but I don’t drink and I don’t smoke.
But I’m in church huffin, cause all this running and jumpin like you gotta be in shape to catch the Holy Ghost.

So, I don’t believe I ever caught him.
Money looking funny. Tithes and Offerings? Sometimes…
So, I know I never bought him.

Dad taught me that if you think long, you think wrong.
So that man up on the throne
Is the reason I didn’t wake up on my own.
That means I owe him more convos than, “Lord, help me with THESE LOANS”!

Yep, so I ain’t stupid.
All those church lessons and choir sessions didn’t end up being useless.

And no I can’t explain it all.
But while I’m still standing tall…
To Jesus is who I give the credit yall.

My car ended up on the side of the highway before A&T,
in the rain, trying to catch a meal.
It’s as simple as A&B,
That two more inches coulda had a tree in my windshield.

So, Imma stop playing church
And Imma stop doing dirt.
Well… I use that last term loosely.
Cause last week she threw it at me, and I ain’t mean to catch it, but it stuck to me.

But if you ever get like me and start to question sometimes…
Just make up your mind…
That the Bible ain’t lyin…

Bringing it back around, you know what’s right so continue to steps.
Every blessing I Thank Him.
And when I’m down, I just say, “Lord, I need your help”!


~Jay Dukes qka Mr. Million Dollars qka Mr. "Hey... You Look Familiar"
FOLLOW ME @jaydukes1911

Opposites Attract

Question: How long do you fight for love when the one you love is fighting against you…
Same story, sad song
I thought this chick was dead wrong

*puts pen down* I’m done… Hold wait…

Another Question:
How do you go from infatuation, to seriously contemplatin
How to turn a crush into a must have?
so tired of fighting for love,
but still I’m sitting in a blood bath

We can rock if you can deal with the mess.
I know I’m not the best, but let me gets this off my chest.
I view you on another level gurl
A pedestal…

But if you don’t care, then I don’t care
If that’s the case, throw down your hair.
Give me time while I’m climbing to be your equal
Lights, cameras, action. Now we working on a sequel.

Wait…
I’m trippin…
Too fast…
Now we working on your people.

Cause they can never see what you see.

And I ain’t mad
Can’t say your swag match my swag.
But if you teach me this dis, I show you dat
I’ll be honest, give you all the facts

And it’s too early to say that I’ll stay when I gotta leave
But here’s my heart, you can have it all I ain’t gotta breathe…

And I ain’t saying I’m seeing visions of you in a dress that’s opposite of black.
I’m just saying why not try it now because opposites attract.

~Jay Dukes qka Mr. Million Dollars qka Mr. "Hey... You Look Familiar" 
FOLLOW me @jaydukes1911

Excerpts from My Book/Life Story/Journal

Since I could remember, every time I saw a microphone, I would grab it. I bet you are thinking that my next statement is, “The world could see that I was destined to be a famous super star singer since birth”! But… Not quite. I never said I would sing. I loved the attention and I would just talk. And talk… AND TALK… That was me--- > Age three. Jamaal Rashon Dukes. Don’t get confused, but my family would call me Shon. So, for the longest time, if anybody would ask me, “Hey… lil’ guy. What’s your name”? I would reply, “Shon Jamaal Rashon Dukes”. They tried to correct me, but I wouldn’t listen because why would my Ma call me that if it wasn’t my name! I was already thinking logically at age three!

You all really don’t understand. I would talk a lot and I could actually speak very well for my age. Matter of fact, in public, people thought my mother was crazy because who could this lady possibly be having full length conversations with? Not this little boy…

“Did you see anything in that store you liked”?

“No ma’am. But I’m hungry”.

“What do you want to eat”?

“Chicken”!

“Chicken? With French fries”?

“Yes ma’am… But not France fries… American FRIES”!!! (I never understood the concept of “French” fries since we lived in America. Never sat well with me).

 

Not only did I talk ALL THE TIME! I found myself getting into things. I wouldn’t say I was a BAD child (side eye). I was just curious. For example:

 

“MAAAA… If we get on this moving stair thingy, you don’t have to hold my hand because I’m a big boy.”

“Ok… But stay close to me”.

“Yes ma’am"

“Step up…”
“Got it! But ummm… Mommy?”

“Yes”?

“What happens… If I go… backwards!”

“Shon! Stop! Boy… C- her-”

It quickly went from fun and games to a very serious moment when I no longer heard my mother‘s voice, but several voices of worried bystanders… “Oh My God. Look! Oh My God!” Terrified, I turned around and screamed, “MAMA!!!!”

In an attempt to stop me from misbehaving my mother slipped on one of the shopping bags and began to tumble backwards down the escalator. Out of at least fifty people watching, ONE lady ran through the crowd and hit the emergency stop button. When my mother got to her feet, I’m sure that she wanted to curse ALL the bystanders and myself out! But she just whispered, “Thank You Jesus”.

 

Actually, that was her answer for everything in my early childhood before the whoopins began. (Which was about a whole six months. lol) One time I got my head stuck between the railings on the staircase outside at my aunt’s apartment. The fire department had to come and use the crowbar to get me out. And one time, I was in our old school red van with my sister, Jamila, at the post office. No clue why I was feeling a little froggy, but I started banging my head against the windshield and saying, “I’m Da’ Man, I’m Da’ Man, I’M DA’ MAN”! *crack* And I cracked the whole windshield! From the top to the wiper! In that same van, we were riding one day and somehow I got out of my own car seat, opened the door and was swag surfin’ over a bridge, looking at the street! NO LIE! I definitely wasn’t a bad child. (side eye) Just the youngest and a momma’s boy! Love me some Ma Dukes.

 

Ma Dukes is a good Christian woman. She strongly stood by the scripture that says, “Train up a child in the way he should go”. We were in church every Sunday for service, Wednesday for Bible study, Saturday for drama practice and Second Sunday evenings for choir rehearsal! (And I can’t even sing). But we were there. 

 

Right beside my brothers from another mother, Josh and Chris. And my sisters from another (can’t really find a word to rhyme with sister. But you get the point.) Our sisters from another mother. We were definitely a dysfunctional family. But at least a family. We spent so much time in church together that we HAD to be. Josh, Chris and myself were like the three amigos. We all came from different families, but alike at the same time. Abuse, drugs and all that jazz was something that we could all relate to. We were so competitive. Who was the tallest? Who was the strongest? Who could get the most girls? (depending on when I release this, this probably is a current competition.)

 

Josh was The Geek. Glasses. Fitted pants. The music head. Real artsy. (You know all artsy people are weird.)  Chris was The Athlete. Boy was FAST. Like REALLY fast.  We KNEW Chris was going to the Pros! I thought I was going to the Pros too in little league… SIKE!

 

I did play little league, but I didn’t love it. I was just “that dude”. I was the Cool Kid out of the bunch. (Did we ever vote? NO… But this is my story, and I’m sticking to it.) Yea, I was the coolest one. Definitely got in the most trouble though. I was the ring leader. But, to my/our defense, I talked us OUT of just as much trouble as I got us into...

THE END

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